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An open letter to Geoff Johns

// December 4th, 2009 // Comics, Humor, Review

Dear Geoff,

as of tonight, I have sat through Grant Morrison’s shit-tastic Final Crisis, your Flash Rebirth and Blackest Night: Flash.

As a huge fan of your work and of the formerly great Flash franchise, I need to say something to you.

Let it go.

With every step you take, every you breath you make, you stand to further ruin both the good will you have created with fans through outstanding writing and the legacy you have left on the Flash.

The fact is most of us thought bringing back Barry Allen was an unbelievably bad idea.  I’m sure you, Grant and Dan Didio stood around giggling like school girls as you made your plans, but believe me when I say that most of us did not share your excitement.

Final Crisis didn’t help matters, when Barry returned to literally run Darkseid to Death. (Seriously…  what the FUCK?)    And I must tell you I was genuinely excited when I heard that you and Van Sciver would be doing another Rebirth title; I even have a signed Barry-Flash poster from Van Sciver himself proudly adorning my bedroom wall.  Now five issues in, I am a little disappointed.

I mean– first of all–  Barry  retroactively created the Speed Force?   Did we read that right?  And no, wait, come on– Professor Zoom has the Negative Speed Force?   (Again.  What. the. FUCK?)   And now Barry is all grim and gritty because he’s got fucking Mommy issues.  Boo fucking hoo.  You’re super fast.  Your wife has dumps like a truck.  Your grandson is Bart A…   well, two out of three ain’t bad.

My biggest problem though is what it did to Wally.  We were told that Wally is still going to be faster.  Wally is still the Flash and he’s going to be teaching Barry for once.   Yet from minute one, Wally has become impotent as a character.  All he seems to do is run around whining “What do we do Barry???”   Wally is supposed to have more power and more experience at this point, yet he is written off as a damn puppy.  What’s the point?   Why ruin all the work you did on the Flash simply because you have fond memories of Silver Age comics?

Then DC announced you and Scotty Kollins on Blackest Night: Flash!  And sweet memories of Rogues Revenge began dancing in my head!  Surely, surely this could not miss!  …

FUCK.  FUCK, FUCK, FUCKITY FUCK FUCK FUCK.

More of the same.  In fact, it’s even worse, because it ruins (and I use that term loosely) Flash Rebirth’s ending.   The whole issue feels like a filler issue where Barry shows up just so you can call it Flash before the Rogues take over the book.  And that is the best part of the book!  The second Barry leaves and Captain Cold takes over, it kicks ass!  The Rogues versus undead Professor Zoom?  I’ll read that shit!  Hell yeah!

But it’s still kind of sad when you think about it.  Barry is what is ruining the book.   Maybe that’s the problem I have with Rebirth.  Barry.  Yeah, I think you should really let it go.

Not that I blame you.  You’re still an amazing writer.  One of the best.  I’m definitely digging Blackest Night, despite DC editorial’s obvious interference in your story organization.  But I think you’re over worked.   Seriously, what are you writing, half of DC’s books at this point?   No writer can outrun exhaustion.  (See what I did there?  Huh, huh?!)

I think your race is run with the Flash.  Give it up. Let some other writer have a turn.  Let it go.

PS, Do you think you could sign some books for me??